Training was really hard today.

It was not the best of days for me, but it was essentially lethal yet fun. Sensei did not let up on the first half and when he told the Black Belts to step back and turn around, I knew it was bad. Drills have a negative connotation in any culture, because it's associated with repetition, fatigue and discomfort.

The chief thing that kept me going through was ego, because my belt was black and I was modelling for the rest of the class. I feel largely uncomfortable now.

I will make some effort to explain this picture. The senior belts were growing childish, first listing superheroes, and finally arriving at reminiscing about Power Rangers. So most kids would know that each Ranger has their own individual weapon like a blaster or dagger and they can put all their weapons together and form a big cannon to shoot the dastard alien.

And that was what we did.
Oh, we have a sense of fun.



Wilding together was really amusing, and Jason and I are often on the same wavelengths in dishing out our unique brand of humour.
This strengthens my opinion that growing up is bad.

When you grow up, you inherit more worries and concerns which isn't exactly the best way to go about your days.

I write again because I need an excuse to listen to good music online and my brain is currently deficient and thus not suited for E-learning or any form of work. I'm liking Secondhand Serenade more and more. They're worth a listen. Actually he's worth a listen.
It's a solo project.

Vulnerable
Share with me the blankets that your wrapped in
because its cold outside cold outside its cold outside
share with me the secrets that you kept in
because its cold inside cold inside its cold inside

and your slowly shaking finger tips
show that your scared like me so
let's pretend we're alone
and I know you may be scared
and I know were unprepared
but I don't care

tell me tell me
what makes you think that you are invincible
I can see it in your eyes that you're so sure
please don't tell me that I am the only one that's vulnerable
impossible

I was born to tell you I love you
isn't that a song already
I get a B in originality
and it's true I cant go on without you
your smile makes me see clearer
if you could only see in the mirror what I see

and your slowly shaking finger tips
show that your scared like me so
let's pretend we're alone
and I know you may be scared
and I know were unprepared
but I don't care

tell me tell me
what makes you think that you are invincible
I can see it in your eyes that you're so sure
please don't tell me that I am the only one that's vulnerable
impossible

slow down girl your not going anywhere
just wait around and see
maybe I am much more you never no what lies ahead
I promise I can be anyone I can be anything
just because you were hurt doesn't mean you shouldn't bleed
I can be anyone anything I promise I can be what you need

tell me tell me
what makes you think that you are invincible
I can see it in your eyes that your so sure
please don't tell me that I am the only one that's vulnerable
impossible

I am sourcing for new material and topics to broadly talk about.
I might be one of those stubborn few who refuses to convert to Facebook, because I still use friendster to locate old friends. Cling on to memories and times spent wilding. These are probably the things that really stick with you.

FINIS.

Now that Pre-University Seminar is over, I no longer have any excuse to account for my despicable laxness. I will have to dive back into schoolwork and prescribed assignments in anticipation of the Mid-Year Examinations.

Bugger.

*

Today would qualify as an interesting day. Duty in the morning was dull and nothing else. The extra eating was unnecessary I should have known better. But at least I got an hour's worth of great sleep in the exhibition hall while we were free to roam, and Derek was nice enough to not rouse me even though the promise of food was open to us.

Got back to house to drink my magic potion: Dumex 6+ and took off for my Dental Appointment. Arrived at Outram Park an hour early, and was pretty much worried about how to while my time, when a little way up the small slope, my slipper snapped.

So, this person promptly removed both slippers and walked barefoot all the way back to the MRT and the length of the covered walkway, looking throught the Pasar Malam for somebody selling slippers. It wasn't very glamourous, but it allowed me to glean an observation. Few people notice feet and footwear. They look at your face and all, but not your feet.
Is this useful? I doubt it.

Got startled by Gina at White Sands. Flinched too much. In my defense, she appeared out of nowhere in my face quite loudly. I would have like to say that I saw her coming. Bugger. But I would like to say to this lovely girl that I should probably should have greeted her more enthusiastically. SL is remorseful.

Other than sharing my mundane day with the rest of the world, I had another point to add, but I forgot. I think that I will leave something here to pay homage to the forgotten point that would have added wisdom to my post:

SOMETHING

Now that we've gotten that out of the way, I need to purge the anger that is exacerbating my stomach acid problem. At the gym yesterday, while I was training with Hakim, this royal asshole occupied the Smith machine and several other weights in the public gym and was running between them in his exercises and took an unbelievably long time to finish his turn. While I was quick to lend him my weights early on, he was not so cordial with me.

He spoke funny, hogged the station, made my gym session stretch from the regular 90 minutes to 2 hours of my time, disrupted my mealtimes and brought about a subsequent unpleasant evening.

Yes, I'm blaming them on him.

Other than being hungry, I loathe training too long in the gym. A quick dose of 45 mins to 90 mins is enough to work yourself hard enough to exhaustion and to see gains. After you've trained for a period of time, the processes in your body turn catabolic, and isn't beneficial for your muscles. Which goes against what you're striving to do in there.

Hence, there isn't any intelligence behind staying in the gym longer than that, unless there's a really pretty girl. But then again, unless you're me, your chances with that girl is zero, should you should probably exuent, like they do in Shakespeare's plays.

General advice:
KISS: Keep It Short, Stupid!

I'm very irritable when dealing with silly/stupid people. Their blundering fashions grate on my nerves. I wanted to hit out at his face, but then I was also sober and therefore aware of the consequences of being a brute. But I've gain another piece of philosophy.

Violence is uncivilised and damaging, but is more preferable because it's the fastest way to make the other guy shut-up.

I'm not shaking with rage actually, I'm simply disgruntled.
You may dismiss me as a raving or unbalanced, but I like to think I speaketh sense.

It didn't rain. I didn't run either.

*

I suspect that I might have overtrained, because I exhibit several tell-tale symptoms:

Washed-out feeling, tired, drained, lack of energy
Sudden drop in performance
Decrease in training capacity / intensity
Moodiness and irritability
Loss of enthusiasm for the sport
Decreased appetite
A compulsive need to exercise
Decreased body fat and post-exercise body weight
Increased basal metabolic rate
Chronic fatigue
Sleep and eating disorders
Headaches, gastrointestinal distress
Muscle soreness and damage
Joint aches and pains

I concede that I feel very tired and I'm still feeling aches from the weekend's activities and it seems no amount of food can satiate my raveneous appetite, but I actually don't feel like eating much. I'm very irritable, that's for sure and even though I might not be up to it, I still want to work out.

We'll see.

'We'll see' is a cryptic response to stall the realisation that the event promised is an impossibility. Is that a big chunk? Take your time. I'm irritable and I won't bother to explain it.

*

I've lost momentum in blogging. I've wondered about blogging seriously because it seems citizen-journalism would be rather lucrative, but bouts of stop-and-go whilst writing aren't foreign to me.


And my favourite:




HAPPY ENDING
This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.

Wake up in the morning, stumble on my life
Can't get no love without sacrifice
If anything should happen, I guess I wish you well
A little bit of heaven, but a little bit of hell

This is the hardest story that I've ever told
No hope, or love, or glory
Happy endings gone forever more
I feel as if I feel as if I'm wasted
And I'm wastin' everyday

This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.

2 o'clock in the morning, something's on my mind
Can't get no rest; keep walkin' around
If I pretend that nothin' ever went wrong, I can get to my sleep
I can think that we just carried on

This is the hardest story that I've ever told
No hope, or love, or glory
Happy endings gone forever more
I feel as if I feel as if I'm wasted
And I'm wastin' everyday

This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.

A Little bit of love, little bit of love
Little bit of love, little bit of love [repeat]

I feel as if I'm wasted
And I'm wastin' everyday

This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
To live the rest of our life,
But not together.

I'm rarely making sense. It would take the likes of Robert Langdon and Sophie Neveau to decode what I'm actually saying. I now think that there isn't any wisdom in my outbursts.

FINIS.

If you live in Pasir Ris like me, then you must have heard the low rumbling.

It's grown more intermittent and I think I've been foolish to push my running plans till a bit later in the afternoon, because it seems that rain is on its way.

I have more to say, but I must get my dose of pavement today first.

I hope it will not come to this:

There was a time where I wrote spontaneously and hadn't anything in mind before I started. Everything was murky and uncertain, but as I poured out in between the lines, it all settled, and I had a satisfactory end product that was birthed out of pure inspiration. I like that.

That bit of skill has been dimmed by the constrictive way we do essays now.

Watched Secret for the 13th time. It still drew out the same, or even more pronounced sentiments from me, and it didn't help that I also saw an innocent little post-it. I don't know why I let it stick in place for thus long and that I haven't bothered to peel it off either.
I endeavour to figure out why it makes me feel like this.
The excellent music pieces?
The deft and wit of the story?
The chaste romance and its melancholy, as well as the frightful possibility of never seeing the person you love again.

Or I'm just a big softie who has cotton-fluffs in the cavity that should be my heart.
I like the movie and it's still fresh to me in essentials, lest for the plot. I like chaste romance.
My tastes don't fade away too quickly I think.

*

Took a short break at the asterisk (*) to fry scrambled eggs. Tasty.
In the span of coming up with a presentable post for the rest of the human race, I had gone from hungry to being satiated then to being hungry again, and also scalded my hand while brewing coffee.

I count 4 things going through my mind while I was letting the hot liquid trickle into the mug, and my phone rang very loudly and the trickle was diverted onto my left hand. F-, it was hot and I threw the mug down and brown mocha sprayed everywhere. Did a slip-shod job of cleaning up. Must let my mother lay her eyes on the aftermath, seeing that it was her who called and only asked a silly question.

Now I struggle to recall what were the 4 things.

1. Whether or not to plunge into the National Poomsae Competition in June. Already have a Karate Kata Tournament waiting for me soon, and I'm very reluctant to put more time with TKD but I fear I might miss the fun.

2. Green font on post-it.

3. Can't remember.

4. Can't remember.

I think you can safely divulge your secrets to me, especially if you only need to offload. Because I will forget things that aren't really my concerns. Seeing that I've already forgotten things that went through my brilliant mind 20 minutes ago. I realise there is some irony in what I've just said, because I asserted that my intellect is brilliant and yet I was forgetful. But there isn't any lucid link between remembering trivials and my gift. Let's move on.

I think I will let the post-it lie and spring up on me another time. I want to contest my feelings then against the sentiments now.

A lot of unpleasant things have happened these days at home. My role in this family unit has expanded, and this reels me to the fact that I'm adult and that the eldest son has more to do in upholding the family unit than cruising through the day and living to his whims and fancies. I would very much like to live like a tiny kid or wild-child without too much cares.
But sadly, this option isn't available.
And I have to grow up according to expectations.

Funny how I think of a cockroach when I wrote adult. I do not fear the brown-black abhorrent thing, and I prefer to kill it with a weapon without staining my hands and feet.
Some people would feel otherwise, and to placate their ego, I will say that most people have respect for the roach and will gladly let it pass before them. They prefer to stay far away. Haha.

I think that instead of waging wars and planning elaborate terrorist strikes on civilisation, everybody should turn to destroy the immortal cockroach because it is a nuisance, an eyesore and the symbol of disgusting.

I am not being silly. My silliness is usually a symptom of a lack of sleep, hunger, severe deprivation of comfort and amusement and also heartbreak. None of the above apply now. I conclude I am rather rational.

These four-days have been really harsh on my system and it was self-inflicted.
Thursday, I had a really hard and foreign workout with Kah Kee and it really hurt my chest and it still is abit tender to the touch now.
Friday's Karate was quite hard too; Saturday I ran to Changi Village at a hot time, and when I got back to Pasir Ris, I carried on by doing several sprints.
Sunday was gym again with Kah Kee and Hakim and we did three mega-supersets with big muscle groups. Hakim kept telling me I was crazy. I was very winded but glad from the -ah- feeling of exertion. Night was Karate again and I slept very well when I finally got the chance to rest.

With regard to weights training, Shern asked me if I took any supplements to get to now and she thought it wasn't possible to get good muscle without supplements. The funny thing was that, when I did drink protein shakes, I didn't get as much results as now. And when I drank the delicious flavours, I was a relative beginner and by rights should have gained more.

But growth and improvement isn't reaped from taking magic pills, but by good training methods and recovery. You need to punish/bully your body and then answer the responses by eating good food and resting more. Protein shakes aren't a part of the mix.

End of lesson.

Where do I get my wisdom? I have vague ideas. But maybe when I share my tastes, you can gain more ideas.

This book is a good read and rights the stupid, slanted image typical Americans, (a synonym for ignorant) have of Islam and explains the distortions of the meaning of the word jihad, and how come so many silly people are suicide bombers-they have been misled.
: The Faithful Spy
It's by a reporter, Alex Berenson. If you have the same taste as me and you want to read the book and you normally go to White Sands library, then you gotta wait until I finish reading it at least 3 more times.

This song is sweet.
: 'Way Back into Love'

(Drew Barrymore)
I've been living with a shadow overhead,
I've been sleeping with a cloud above my bed,
I've been lonely for so long,
Trapped in the past,
I just can't seem to move on!

(Hugh Grant)
I've been hiding all my hopes and dreams away,
Just in case I ever need them again someday,
I've been setting aside time,
To clear a little space in the corners of my mind!

(Both)
All I want to do is find a way back into love.
I can't make it through without a way back into love.
Oooooh.

(Drew Barrymore)
I've been watching but the stars refuse to shine,
I've been searching but i just don't see the signs,
I know that it's out there,
There's got to be something for my soul somewhere!

(Hugh Grant)
I've been looking for someone to shed some light,
Not somebody just to get me through the night,
I could use some direction,
And I'm open to your suggestions.

(Both)
All I want to do is find a way back into love.
I can't make it through without a way back into love.
And if I open my heart again,
I guess I'm hoping you'll be there for me in the end!
Oooooooh, Ooooooh, Ooooooh.

(Drew Barrymore)
There are moments when I don't know if it's real
Or if anybody feels the way I feel
I need inspiration
Not just another negotiation

(Both)
All I want to do is find a way back into love,
I can't make it through without a way back into love,
And if I open my heart to you,
I'm hoping you'll show me what to do,
And if you help me to start again,
You know that I'll be there for you in the end!

I realised that I've always had my picture with a certain individual, just that there's a lot of other people in it also.

Wild dreams are reserved for bed. Then you wake up.

I think that we presume the world cares about what we say when we blog.

What else have I not said? I forgot.

FINIS.

I feel a swell of pride when the words "Manchester United FC" appear under UEFA Champions League 2007/2008 winner.

We also have the Premiership title this year.

This baby is on its way to Manchester now.

Soccer Final today was exceedingly satisfying. It provided an opportunity for us men to misbehave and become serious loud bastards, and also gave us some ammunition to diss VJC people. We won 2-1, which fulfilled Derek's prediction, and thwarted my expectation of a harder-fought 3-2 victory, still in favour of my college.







But hey, I gave the VJC team a little more credit because I presumed that the final would be a ferocious affair reminiscent of the 1999 Manchester United-Bayern Munich Champions League final. Nearly 10 years later, Manchester United is in the finals again. I think that history would motivate them to win and I am in the same composure like in the afternoon before MJC vs VJC, that my team would be hoisting up a shining silver trophy.



But I was talking about the localized affair today, wasn't I?
I got to meet some old friends like Xian Zheng and Sherwin, and I exposed my bicep, Billy to the both of them. Song Leng has come a long way from being paunchy.

I'm pleasantly surprised that Xian Zheng reads my blog. I'm very flattered and I do hope that my blog does amuse and appeal to him. He is an excellent chap and an excellent monitor. This means that I have extensive blog readership? Interesting.
And I've given Sherwin something to cringe about for most of June. Haven't seen her in a while either. Pity I didn't meet more people.

That's it for the soccer final. MJC won 2-1, and the second goal was fantastic and a third almost happened. I'm still reeling from the picturesque conclusion to the soccer season.

It's May now, and I looked back at last year to see what was I up to at this time.
I had only begun to train in the gym properly due to guidance from my cousin and also we had an end of term celebration by watching Pirates of the Carribbean 3 as a school.

Heady happy days.
Don't think I can return to days like those.
The Mid-Years are 4 weeks ahead, and I think it is time we start passing, according to esteemed House Captain Jeremy.

With these 4 weeks, I can make it work for me by:

1) Completing the work that I owe (psychologically) in the form of overdue assignments and neglected tutorials.

2) Start doing math regularly (daily).

3) Study more than 1 topic for Biology this examination.

4) Get serious muscle and earn a decent tan by running regularly under the scorching sun.

I rarely finish what I set out to do, but there's always room for a first and also optimism.
Blinding optimism, that's what.

Tomorrow's activities isn't very appealing. I ardently hope I can either hit the weights, or run. I need them. But for now, I need restive sleep.
Sleep is super important. I am in favour of ditching everything and heading to bed.

While saying goodbye, who is 'my sugar plum'? I'm not really sure, even though I have ideas. Please tell me, girl. I don't like guessing.

finis

I'm slightly angry now.
Due to silly Derek, we sat through the unnecessary usher briefing in the Lecture Theatre, and had to contend with several lesser minds, also grow hungry, while my limited time to do work was eaten away by the irrelevance of the meeting.

Afterward, my wait was extended by another silly person who was rarely on the ball at most times. I dread coming into contact with this individual.
Then Derek, while trying to get back at me for 'being a bastard' to him most of the day made me walk with him to his bus stop because the bus hadn't arrived yet. I missed 2 buses as a result.
It was funny, but it made the hunger in my system more long-drawn and delayed my getting home and refilling my tank.

I could be petty, but one thing you gotta understand about snobbish Song Leng, is that he hates two things. Take your time to process the above.
Song Leng hates dealing out with people he deems as lesser minds, because it will be detrimental to his mental health and sanity. The brain pool would be tainted by their blumbering stupidity.
BB and other avenues where I've stayed for short stints have harmed the sanctity of my brain quite enough for a lifetime.

I ardently hope that such instances of cooperation will be scarce and brief.
Like Xian Zheng wisely said, "Never argue with a fool-they will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience."
The Fool's Law.

The second thing Song Leng absolutely detests is going hungry. Hunger is a lousy feeling. Your stomach churns and feels like there are fumes about inside and you become incoherent, insensible and less functional. The important biological processes in your body go into Red Alert and start signaling your body to shut down all other businesses like building muscle and supplying your brain and muscle with nutrients.
You're less alert, more docile and weaker.
The precious muscle you can gain is given up in favour of responding to your immediate hunger crisis.

There isn't any insulin (that is secreted to handle the surge in food after a meal) and this results in an inhibition of absorbing amino acids into cells, more breakdown of protein which is what you do not want if you're looking to gain hard-earned muscle. This is why I severely hate getting hungry.

The thing most essential to a workout plan is eating right, and with the inconveniences of modern living, with an unpleasant time schedule that is not within our control, and also the diminished value in food because of the numerous processing steps in manufacturing, it is a difficult thing to do.

You can eat right and not workout as much and still be in pretty good shape.
Your body is a machine and it runs best on good food, i.e. good nutritious food, not half-assed nonsense like fastfood or soft drinks. So I try my best to keep myself sated and not ruin the metabolic processes that are in favour of building good muscle through insulin-motivated protein synthesis. That is why I eat so frequently.
So don't ruin my eating plans, or I will bite you.

Those people who eat whatever they want and still workout are probably people who have substantial muscle but are still in essential, fat. Those people who aren't are blessed with a divine metabolism and I'm really envious. But we can't see the processes going on inside their bodies and they might one day suffer a heart attack or what because they're not feeding their bodies right.

I want to defend the use of supplements in the form of protein shakes, because I find them beneficial and convenient. They're not damaging to your kidneys contrary to old beliefs and what I used to think; salt is the one that is killing off your kidneys. Protein shakes is milk powder enriched with nutrients and amino acids which improves muscle recovery and is a quick meal when you don't have time. If they weren't so pricey, I'd buy it and stockpile it.
Otherwise, I have to contend with good meals.
So pardon me if I'm not that pleasant.

My angry post has turned out to be mostly an article about the importance of healthy eating.
Bugger.

A hungry man is an angry one and I bit back at her when she tried to upset me just now. I'm already unhappy. So she just got more attitude out of me. I am proud.

To Derek: I want to throttle you. Glucaneogenesis is a hateful process that endangers your muscles. I will have my revenge on you tomorrow.

I am however grateful to the Lord who has arranged for me to avoid all of my calamities today and even though He has helped me fend off some of them, they will soon come to pass anyway. I am glad that I have the moral fibre not to dodge, but instead stay and sit through the unpleasant things. I'm sorry for being silly and non-amusing.

I've uncontrollably wasted time here expounding on my unhappiness. Blogging is an avenue for me to expel all the bad feel. I am sorry once again, if the material here in my site is not as enlightening as I promised.

finis

N.B. Gluconeogenesis is a metabolic pathwaythat results in the generation of glucose from non-carbohydrate carbon substrates such as pyruvate , lactate, glycerol, and glucogenic amino acids.

I haven't had my weekend.
I haven't done my work.
I haven't watched any television.
It will be bedtime soon and the weekend is ending.
I have to see Wang tomorrow for my act of mischief in the lab.

I think that the above is a really dark combination that promises that my Tuesday will be barely tolerable. Funny how we wake up and not go to school and can still suffer from Monday's Blues.
But, I seek to balance it with the better things that happened from Friday til Monday.

Here they are:

After a difficult time at NTU stuck in a lousy role and working with extremely silly people, I came home on Friday to a few sweet fights in the dojo with several people. Roughed them up a bit. But my ribs hurt from Jason's sharp jabs. So I understood how Hakim felt in a small way.

Saturday morning had me plenty amused by Derek and after extended bouts of hunger and hanging with really unintelligent members of the human race , we finally got away from the Pre-U Seminar business for that day and headed to Wan Chai to have our lunch. It was really good tasting. I like beef a lot now, I guess.

Sunday was rather fun and more amusing than the previous year's competition because of the crowd and of course the name synonymous with fun and crazy, Song Leng. Met Ahmad, who was at TPJC with me for the PAE period; jostled with my partners and also Dennis, Alvin and Wai Leong and John, Bing Ran and somebody called Chee Kuan and many others.

Derived amusement from the prize presentation bit on the mat, where I named my trophy 'William' (or you can call him Bill). I felt rather expressive at that mildly frustrating moment where we watched the main prizes go over to the other colleges while the colours of trophies coming over to our side were dull coloured. Was unhappy that I was not getting to train that I did a 150 push-up in sets of 25.

Woke up today and got to the gym with Hakim and hit the weights to temper the days spent not getting out to run or doing some quick lifting. The gym got really crowded, which really irked me.
Some non-smart people were at it for probably 3 hours. If your workout stretches to about 3 hours, it is both too easy and time wasting. Your body's response to stress would already have been different.
Have gotten stronger in almost all of the bits I was working on. A mood-boosting bit that made me quite happy.
I've been hearing that I've gotten bigger now. Really?
Please verify this, because negative/positive feedback is crucial in maintaining a stable internal environment.

I have to turn and rightly look at the hordes of work that are waiting for me. Blogging is an escape I take to stall looking at the unsightly things that I am required to do. Perhaps I can convince myself that it will do me a lot of good.

Will have to push and do something unpleasant and difficult.

My taste, apart from beef:

'Misery Business', Paramore
'Maybe', Secondhand Serenade
'Your Call', Secondhand Serenade
'Fall for You', Secondhand Serenade

finis

I just checked, that I've had 198 posts in this avenue and I'm eager to make it 200.
But I want to be sure that I'm really saying something worth its weight and not a regular flippant post with little content or depth.

I've delayed writing about the Sichuan Earthquake because I needed to marshal my thoughts and to learn more about it. It measured 7.9 on the Richter Magnitude Scale, and a quake like that is considered a major one that affects over a large area. The quake is approximately equal to 600 megatons of TNT and is equivalent to 2.4 EJ (exa-joules 10^18) of energy.
As of today May 15, 19,509 people are dead and 69,487 people are injured.

From our comfy seat at the computer, the figures are only statistics and nothing very much more than unfriendly numbers. But behind every death, there is a story of a life snuffed out, and very prematurely for most.

I opened the paper yesterday to see the picture where soldiers were uncovering the rubble at Juyuan Middle school where 900 students and teachers were crushed under at the moment of the quake. The children in the photograph looked like they were only sleeping and unhurt, and they were really young, probably even younger than my sister.

I took a few looks at the picture and avoided it for the rest of the paper.
I don't like the way that death and suffering and disaster all came together in one shot, where the soldiers were too late to rescue the children; the children were already claimed, and their small bodies were huddled together and on top of each other; an occasional face closed in permanent sleep peeked out from under the child on the top of the pile.

There must be still be children underneath and we can only try and guess how frightened these children were when the world came down on them, and their discomfort.
Did they pass away immediately, or did they fade away slowly?

A catastrophe like this also lets us catch glimpses of the resilience of human life, where a pregnant woman survived for 50 hours under the rubble; the love a parent has for their child, where a couple used their bodies to shield their 3-year-old daughter from the walls. The little girl survived; they didn't.

Who of us can understand a parent's grief at the loss of the child that they borne and loved?
A little seed that blossomed inside the mother's stomach for nine months and then continued to hold your hand for the next few years after his or her crying entrance into a world full of turbulence and stimulus. My grandparents are still reeling from the loss of their eldest son which was almost 20 years ago.

These parents will continue to cry tears like they did when they saw the broken body of their child for years.

Every death is a tragedy. This makes the whole affair a compound tragedy.
We don't inherit the full solemnness of this disaster because it's not near to us. But I'd prefer if this would be far far away.

But I am not surprised at any of this, because all of it has been predicted in the Bible.
"For nation will rise up against nation, and kingdom against kingdom; there will be earthquakes in various places; there will also be famines. These things are merely the beginning of birth pangs".

Mark 13:8 said this. But what really worries me is the fact that the Bible speaks lightly of wars and earthquakes and dismisses them as the beginning of birth pangs, which hints that something more painful and much worse will be on its way.
The Bible is deathly accurate. We should anticipate famines, given the global food shortage problem.

I was going to talk on love, and more cheerful things and also an interesting test that Derek shared with me and I find rather simple, but crisp. I was going to slyly make mention to a girl that I'm leaning towards slightly in the words I laid down above.
But I think I won't tonight.

It doesn't bother me that much even if tonight is the last night we would have.

Few things can beat this.
This is bliss:

It's a wonderful feeling to hold the girl you think about most times so close, and to feel the rhythm of her breathing, and to whisper and murmur to each other until your voices both die away and you both slip into sleep.

finis

I fear it is overkill to write again on a consecutive day following yesterday's heavy dose of Song Leng. But Song Leng is extremely beneficial for health. Have some more.

A gruelling run that I conned, bribed and coaxed myself into has chased away some of the moodiness. Ten minutes of severe discomfort on the pavement. Last week's run on the same route was terrible because I was slow and wearied. Pushed harder today to sprint more and faster and put more into the session, because it would be the last sliver of opportunity for me to run.

Pre-U Sem and Competition will fill up the weekend and rob me of time well spent.
Hence, I headed out to run.

I love and hate running. Running brings you close to your weaknesses and when you ditch them you feel on top of the world, but before the sweet endorphins that gives you the 'runner's high' kicks in, you feel endless discomfort. But it's primal and the best form of exercise ever.

Run lor.

We probably shouldn't be afraid to take the first step. But when we take out the first step, we have to finish the distance.

I'm thinking more and more about my current way of life and comparing this year and last, where it seems that we got shifted into the next time without our consciousness adapting.
This time next year, I'll inherit new concerns in a new place and new agonies, and I will be looking back in the same light I have now.
So if I can anticipate my reminiscing, I should steer my life right now, so that I will do better at things and craft nicer credentials.

I was going to write 'the future' above, but I didn't.
Don't like the gravity of the words and also because the future is scary.
Not monster-scary, but unknown scary like the darkness.

Moving on, I hear happiness is just an illusion.
I think I agree. It's not that it's not real, but that it's so fleeting that so after, it's not there anymore. You no longer am sure if it ever was there.

Anyway, happiness has no relation with contentment, because I believe that there isn't such a thing as contentment either.

Was I ever happy? Are you happy?

This is a veiled message to an unknown person:
I presume I'm a bad guy and am severely detestable to you.
Am I bothered to change any of it?
Currently no.

I'm not that brilliant anyway. I hate show-offs even though I am one; I do not do my homework that often and I am verbally uncouth most times. Ample reason to turn against me.

So hate me.
I bet it's hard though, and I blame my other qualities.

I will leave something here about liking a person.
Sometimes we don't have to be with our special someone. All we want to do is to capture a picture of her and freeze it in our minds and hold on to it for as long as we can.
Contentment? Maybe.

I'm treating my blog like a pensieve. But I have the stinking feeling that something has not come out of me and landed here in the form of thin black pixels.

If I like you, I will take you aside and tell you.

Signs are unreliable. Waiting is disgusting.

My post is rarely political, because my voice is usually aimed at general amusement. Not lieutenant, but general. Pardon my spontaneity in giving a bad joke. And so early in my post too. I'm sorry, please do not leave.
I'm not very political, because I'm rather indifferent to PAP being in power because they're doing an OK job. I'm only miffed at the inflations and the rising costs, which makes prices of regular items unreasonable. I can no longer shop at GNC.
I only have one question for the ruling party:
Is the rise in costs and living indicative of our economic growth and prosperity?

Life is getting hard, this is my observation.

I am prejudiced against obese people. This is not inspired by Ong.
Because I know some great people who have a weight problem, I will revise what I said.
I am prejudiced against people who are obese and do not do anything to change that.
They accept that their 'condition' is permanent and cannot be changed and hence they do not make any effort to alter any of it.
I was fat before, and so were Jem and Dicky.
Getting the body you want is loads of hard work and people are often afraid of a little hard work and discomfort (or pain).
But nothing worth having comes easy, and you probably need to reconsider if your sex appeal and health is something worth fighting for.

Because of this, I will take time to talk about weight training.

1. You're actually getting a response from your body by hitting your muscles with stressful weights. Your muscles are stressed.


2. Your muscles when stressed, will proceed to increase in size and strength so that it will be able to handle the same stress next time.


3. This process is aided by several important players: insulin, testosterone, human growth hormone (HGH), amino acids and most importantly, sleep!
   

It's actually quite a simple thing. But the most important thing to note is that you cannot go on using the same exercises and routines forever. Change is necessary to ensure further breakthroughs and improvements.

Why? The human body is extremely adaptive and capable of impossible feats. If we were to possess a super power, our adaptiveness would be it. If you give your body the same stimulus all the time, your body gets used to it. You do not progress and you do not grow.

So to those people who assume that more of the same is better and go for manymanymany sets of one exercise, I'm sorry, but you should be grateful that I've explained why you're still looking the same, or even sliding backwards.

Tip: Do a compound exercise, like the squat or the bent-over row in addition to your normal exercises. Bigger movements will produce more growth hormone.
More growth hormone=more growth

I will catapult into an entirely irrelevant topic now.
I feel vindictative evil joy from my frosty outward disposition.
I prefer to dictate where and how things will move, and also if they move in any way.

Here ends my irrelevance.

I was bullied by Dawn today, and followed by a host of other people. Victimization is new to me. I do not understand how I lost my potency to tease. I think a good sleep will cure this. And Dawn in drawing a green smiley face on the back of my neck during math lecture, will anticipate a grand scheme of revenge.

I do have a sense of humour, but she was plain nasty : (
Your sense of humour is an indicator of mental health.

People who don't laugh are crazy.
However, people who laugh too much and for no good reason are also crazy.

My bed is calling out to me. I will not resist.
Shez hates people posting song lyrics. I like to annoy Shez. Hakim sang me this song to me in tutorial.

Westlife- Why Do I Love You

Suddenly she's leaving
Suddenly the promise of love has gone
Suddenly breathing seems so hard to do

Carefully you planned it
I got to know just a minute to late oh girl
Now I understand it
All the times we, made love together
Baby you were thinking of him

Why do I love you
Don't even want to
Why do I love you like I do
Like I always do
You should have told me
Why did you had to be untrue
(Love you like I do)
Why do I love you like I do

Ain't gonna show no weakness
I'm gonna smile and tell the whole world I'm fine
I'm gonna keep my senses
But deep down where no one can hear me
Baby I'll be crying for you

Why do I love you
Don't even want to
Why do I love you like I do
Like I always do
You should have told me
Why did you had to be untrue
(Love you like I do)
Why do I love you like I do

Can't go back
Can't erase
Baby your smiling face
Oh no, I can't think of nothing else but you (else but you) suddenly

Why do I love you
Don't even want to
Why do I love you like I do
Like I always do
You should have told me
Why did you had to be untrue
(Love you like I do)
Why do I love you like I do

Why do I love you
Don't even want to
Why do I love you like I do
Like I always do
You should have told me
Why did you had to be untrue
(Love you like I do)
Why do I love you like I do

Sometimes, liking someone cannot be explained.


Pum Dollaros Dechapratumwon

finis

I like my Sunday.
Did a small quantity of work and my arse is mostly covered for at least until Tuesday; I got a hard workout in the gym with Zicong; got to watch my TV, and got a dose of major beauty and elegance online.

I'm not supposed to be at this spot and talking to the Whole Wide World (WWW) like the person who came to talk about blogging responsibly on Thursday, not because I'm offending people, but because I should see off my GP and Literature Essay outline.

But anyway, I've strayed slightly but I think I might be able to earn a pardon and also a slap on the back by leaving the following pictures of a really beautiful and desirable woman here.

I don't think anyone would be offended by these?



Her name is Im Ji Hye and she's a Korean race queen and model. She was first spotted at the 2007 Seoul Motor Show and has since made the cover of Maxim korea and numerous spots on Korean TV. This 1.72m beauty was born on Valentine’s Day, 14 Feb 1987.







finis

Today was Mother's Day and so as a mini-clan, we went to a food place in Joo Chiat to eat.
I got off the car and stepped to the road and took the picture of this red building my mother pointed out to me.

This is the place that we went to. Ubin.

My sister and cousin, the first to reach.

The Planning Committee:

Ah Ma, Tua Pek, 5th Uncle, Mum and Tua Sim in the back.

Sister and youngest cousin.

It was supposed to be a photo with the three male products of the Lau Clan, but George decided he didn't want his face in the picture.

Same two people.

One's cute, the other isn't.

Me and Samuel. We're closer now, and he's grown into a more fun and nicer chap. Growing up fast.

George, Siew Hui, Eunice

Us and Ah Ma.

It was not a bad evening.

The Tv's showing Doom now.

I do not like dealing with the unseen.

finis

How should I begin spilling the inner workings of my brilliant mind into this hurried post?
Time clears everything up.
In time, justice is allowed to work and reach offenders; love is cultivated and breathed on, and people forget. Time dulls the freshness of raw pain, hurt or sorrow and mellows it into something slight that registers only occasionally.

Is the above too convoluted? Song Leng was merely trying to say that with time, things are allowed to ferment and grow better, whether if it's a heartbreak, or a death of someone dear to you. So if you're in distress, count on time to make things better.

Karate last night was hard. Dickson and Jeremy came to try out the training and they made it for the later bit of the first half, where we were drilling our strikes and kicks. The 50 rep and 200 rep kick probably was a surprise for them I think, as well as the finger and backhand push-ups. Sensei also commented that Dicky was very fit.

The later bit of the night was kumite, which opened their eyes to Kyokushin fighting.
Sensei asked the Black Belts present to give hard kumite to the more senior belts that might be going for tournament and since my system was yearning for hard pounding, I went a bit harsher on the people I met.

I think I fought 12 people, each for 1 minute and I was rather pleased with scoring several headshots and also good blows to their body. My intent wasn't simply to hurt them, but also to draw out a harder fight from them and steel them for the lack of mercy that the Gurkha fighters would show on the mat.
But knowing Song Leng, he cannot pass up the opportunity to be a full-fledged bastard.


This is one of the better rare shots that captures kumite. It's from an All-Japan tournament.

However, I've sustained a few injuries and have some difficulty walking. The possibility of a hard Sunday gym session is rather far away.

This is Mother's Day weekend, and I think everybody is going to be involved in some form of celebration for their mothers and grandmothers and I am too.
This event will rob me of a potentially fruitful Saturday and minimise the time-frame for me to complete the overload of assignments that Ong has decreed she wants done next week.

It will also prevent me from watching a TV serial that I rather fancy and rob me of amusement and small joy.

Interestingly, I opened Lian He Zhao Bao in the morning to read a story about a 21-year-old man who couldn't stand his mother's constant nagging and hit her on the head with a hammer. This happened in Singapore.
It's mildly ironic that it happened so close to Mother's Day, that this fellow attacked his mother.
It's a sin to strike your mother or father.

But I think all of us can sympathise with the bit about not being able to endure our parents' constant nagging and lectures and 'teachings' which go beyond making us simply weary.
The impulse to grow violent is actually quite present, underneath the surface.
But do not hit your mothers!

Sadly, I have not found a defence against the onslaught of nagging. I think the only survival skill is prevention. Don't give them any reason to begin their attacks on our clarity of mind and mental well-being.

I think I will have more to say about my important Hakim and Derek and our daily exploits in injecting humour and joy into this ethreal existence that we are all living through (life), as well as my personal comments on living Godlessly.

In anticipation:
I think that most young Christians find it difficult to live a life that honours God and we would all prefer living freely, and not be bound by the laws and rules that our God has for us.
It would often be easier to live away from God and pretend He doesn't exist.

I'm ending this on a solemn note.

I'd prefer to end this in a light tone.
Like leaving the picture of a really beautiful woman here.



Her name is Jiang Yu Chen and she's only 20. She's rumoured to be Jay Chou's girlfriend.
Why settle for Jay Chou when there's Song Leng?

Good day, netizens.

Do I like the way this week has been going?
I enjoy some aspects of it.
Now that Hakim's no longer a councillor, Derek and I have him all to ourselves and we can tear him apart with our special brand of humour. We've been developing while he's been away and we'll give him the full blow in time. He will be converted to our type soon enough.

A satisfying workout on Sunday gave me delightful aches that lasted til today, but the satisfaction was slightly marred by poor sleep leading up to SPA on Wednesday.
I'm coming to think that our/my health is way more important.

TKD is looking to be a bit more fun and its weird because we're looking at the last bits of my life in CCA and I'm feeling like this. There's been more laughter recently and I 'blame' the new faces that've sprouted into our previously smaller circle. There's been many additions to the Male-Toilet committee, and even though it gets crowded, I prefer it like this.
Will we still have an excuse to make merry in this way on Mondays and some Wednesdays anymore? Unfortunately, no.
I believe unfortunately above will become a sincere very sadly soon.
Hurry, grab a piece of me before I'm all sold out, I'd like to say.

Gym today with Zi Qi was overall relaxed, but it was slightly nostalgic to get to feel Zi Qi's flavour and his little antics of fanning himself and complaining it was hot; or to nudge me to treat him or to turn his head at any and maybe every girl with a pony tail.
He was a bit like irked at the way I was posing in the gym toilet after the workout.
Hey! I'm proud of my physique which is a product of hard work and my embracing discomfort.
I'm open to being a gym partner to anyone, as long as I know you.
There aren't any charges. Just come with me.
But anyone can get my know-how to grow stronger and faster. Just learn.

While at the gym, in order to get Zicky to stop staring, I said this:
The beautiful stranger you meet will get less beautiful as you know her; but the caring friend by you will grow more lovely as days get by.

I am in favour of converting friends into romantic other-halves. It's probably the strongest bond that will last. I'm very dubious of any other forms of knots that complete the links between two people, and also because people are not clear in the mind when they think they're in love.

Admitting you're in love is really a big thing. It validates your emotional attachment to him/her and elevates it to a higher level worth greater consideration.
For me, if I tell you I like you in that way, I am very serious.
And after the episode that concluded a while back, I am apprehensive about being serious.
I need more positive vibes, like Hakim would advise and Derek would ignore. Derek is in favour of drama and an epic love story. He needs to get Korean Drama DVDs.

But if you're sure you do like him/her, then you should tell them and not be reserved.
All rationale is asking you to show hand. But it IS hard to tell-all.

I've reached my quota on expression.

Parting shot:
We rejoice in finding back the things that we have lost!
Losing teaches us to cherish when we have briefly gone without what we missed.

Wisdom!

I think that this lady is rather good-looking. Is it that men have a thing for blondes after all?
She's Rachel Taylor, and was the computer analyst in Transformers. I think that her beauty was dimmed by Megan Fox being in the film.
But she's still gorgeous all the same.

I felt like adding a picture and I chose her.
Analyze my state of mind!

"Heroes are not born. They're built"

My name is Song Leng. I decide what are the things that I want to do, and these are the things that are that are important. Not the fate of the world, nor mankind. I answer to only 2 types of people-people I respect and my God. I loathe it when my plans do not follow through and I am prevented from doing what I plan to (I think I've said this before.)

If I were in Derek's position on Friday, I would not merely be silently fuming. He has a great deal of patience.

I have not gotten to watch TV, I haven't done my Saturday 5km, and I have not started on the multitudes of tutorials. It's a mix that explains my sourness right now.

In stark contrast, morning's TKD was rather purposeful and enjoyable. I like to think that my enduring loveliness made it all the more fun for the rest of the world. I bet they loved my anecdotes about the many things we were talking about. Specifically the 'pear' and 'apple' bit.

The previous night's Karate was also very pleasing. Aside from being Sensei's call-on dummy, I had to gear up into many pads to fight everyone. I don't think it qualifies as a fight however, because I was not allowed to strike, and they were to hit me at all the places. The pads did not prevent the hurting and I got splendid bruises after that. But it was good for me to test out my footwork and my philosophy on controlling of distance = control in a fight. I derived pleasure from darting away from the strikes that were aimed to hurt me and also off-setting my opponents. I wasn't tired or slowing at any point even though I faced more than 10 persons. More stamina maybe? The interesting/ unsightly bit was holding in my mucus because of my cold. Sniff, sniff.

Used up my indulgence meals for this month all in today. Had KFC (ahhhhh, zinger) and a dinner which was fried, oily and full of overly-salty paste. Missed BI XIE JIAN in the evening and got home pissed and all.

The things that are important to me are the ones I wish to do. The rest will be relegated to become less or inconsequential.

Hopefully, Sunday will come into blissful fulfillment where I finish the work that is of immediate emergency (Thermochemistry, GP Reading Journal); workout at the gym and watch my TV. Only 1 aspect of my life will be lacking after all the above are resolved.

I am envious of Jeremy now. I remember vaguely how it was to have someone to think about all the time, but I've forgotten how it feels. I'm left with Megan Fox. But any man who's watched her in Transformers will go crazy if they see this picture and recall that part in the movie. I'm losing my mind.


Above: Megan Fox, the sexiest woman of 2008.

A side note: I do not bother with saving the Earth because I believe that the physical Earth will not last. However, I acknowledge that we need to be better stewards of this planet that the Lord gave to us to tend.

I think I will begin with not littering.



F-22 Raptor

It's featured in Transformers and now Iron Man. Fear the United States, world.